Yep, today I had a very joyful one. The customary routine just an add-ons of unexpected people who just came and got along with me. Nonetheless, it didn’t make it less as a happy day.
But the thing about this night, as I described it earlier as rare, rare in the sense that I know I’m not this person. I am at my weakest at this point of night. This is not the first time. I’ve been through this a lot of times, and every time that I am going through the same phase, it always feels like the first time.
Putting into words… Saddest. Nostalgic. Wistful. Melancholic. Extreme excruciating pain. And you know deep down your subconscious that there’s nothing more you can do to lessen the pain but to burst out. Burst everything out until nothings left. It’s like remembering how you lost everything at once. Missed opportunities. Broken promises. Unhappy ending relationships. Misty future. Summoning regrets.
What else? Sometimes life cuts you, so deep. But I know, that after all these tears run dry, I’m going to be okay. I’ll be fine. I’ll be a new person again. Instilled with wisdom from pain.
Just let the tears flow…